James Duncan

spring frost 1919

hours passed
while i sat
reading alone

inside my
aunt’s apartment
with coffee

later
i walked
by the harbour

i went outside to
see if everything was still there and
everything was still there
how exciting

i came back inside
i chatted to you for maybe 2 hours and
now you are sleeping or
trying to

now my bedroom floor is covered in nail clippings like
tiny shit-colored crescent moons

look at the way i made that sound so beautiful

i want to materialize in your bed
beside your sleeping body

i want to be snug
like water wrapped around your shoulders
and neck

i will hold every part of
you

until you wake up

then i will evaporate

i have been feeling much better
i have been able to think of the idea of you
without feeling like shit

but i am worried that it is only because
the idea of you in my head is getting smaller
and smaller

even though it felt terrible
i was really into the way i felt
that night i texted you

“just really sorry that i exist”

James Duncan is 19 years old. He is from Sydney, Australia.